Post by Milah on Apr 20, 2016 6:34:20 GMT 1
It was a kind of difficult arrangement. To know that her son was alive in town and yet couldn't spend time with him because he wanted distance. She understood it but it hurt nevertheless. It made emotions that she hadn't felt in a long time come back to its surface. Ever since she left her son all she wanted was to see him again. To hold him and to know he was safe and happy. Of course, it hadn't turned out like she had wanted to. She didn't imagine that she would be gone for almost two centuries. She had plenty of ideas of just how much pain she had left her young son with. Some things even one couldn't express with words. She had been trying to understand what her life would lead her to. She honestly didn't expect to be in Storybrooke for long, not with Hades still out there. He'd be coming for the souls who escaped, this much she knew.
She was wrong for so many things in the past. For having snuck out that last night, and not being honest with her son about where she was going and when she'd be back. For lying to Rumple and having him believe that Killian had kidnapped her and that she had been all too unwilling to go. She wondered sometimes what had become of her things that had been aboard the ship, had Killian sold them? Had he dumped them when she had died? She wished that she knew for sure. But her life was different aboard the ship than it had been in the village with her son.
She had learned to block out painful memories, but the ones she kept had to do with both Rumple and Killian and little Baelfire of course. Still now she had to make a new life since the people she knew had moved on with theirs. Yes she still in some ways had her ex-husband and her son in her life--but she wasn't too sure about Killian since she hadn't seen him yet. There was no telling what would happen as a result. But this town--was growing on her. It wasn't home--not yet anyway. But it was getting there. Because her son was here. And that was all that mattered.
She had been sitting in her room at the bed and breakfast. She had just decided to clean up the place, and to get cleaned up herself for the day. As she didn't really have any real plans for the day, because it wasn't like she had much to keep her that busy. There was always the children. Though that, would remind her of her time in the Underworld. Something she was hoping to avoid after all. But of course, what choice did she have? Children--guarding them was something she had always known since being in the Underworld. All of them were young, unable to defend themselves against Hades if he were to go after them. 'Course that didn't surprise her in the least. Nothing about Hades was good.
She didn't know how much her son had missed her. Only that she knew she had caused him pain that would take years to get over, if it was at all possible. She had so much on her mind ever since returning back to life as it were. Of the pain and the heartaches that she'd caused, all had been coming to light. It was hard to put into words the way she felt about all of this. But she couldn't think--dwell on that for now.
It seemed like it was too quiet. Quiet was something she had to get used to. It wasn't like the sea--where it could lull her into a peaceful sleep. That was something she wished for but it never came. Yes she had slept since she had returned to this life, but it was not near as tranquil as it had been when she had once sailed on the Jolly Roger. But that time was over. And she had to remind herself of that. As much as she wished she didn't have to. She'd had a headache so she had a glass of water by her bed and had gotten some 'medicine' that was more modern than what she had been used to, to cure the bloody thing.
Of course she had no idea that she and her son were living in the same place, otherwise she would have gone to see him after their first encounter but she figured it was also better for him to come to her. Because she knew she couldn't keep pushing for it. If he wanted it, he'd seek her out. If not, well she would have to deal with that loss all over again. She had just laid down on her bed when she heard the door being knocked upon. At least she thought it had only been a few minutes, though by looking on the clock it clearly had been at least an hour since she had first laid down. She slowly rose and got to her feet. The headache had minimized thankfully, to where it was almost unnoticeable. She didn't even peep through the hole to see who it was, instead she just opened the door to see her son standing there. With a box of something. "Hello, Baelfire --Neal." She had a hard time still adjusting to the fact he went by Neal here. "Come on in." She opened the door so that her son could have a chance to pass her to come inside. Because once he had, she would shut the door behind him and lock it. Just something she had done ever since her ex-husband had helped her get this room. Since she truly had no where else to go. And even less of an idea who to trust.
Neal Cassidy
She was wrong for so many things in the past. For having snuck out that last night, and not being honest with her son about where she was going and when she'd be back. For lying to Rumple and having him believe that Killian had kidnapped her and that she had been all too unwilling to go. She wondered sometimes what had become of her things that had been aboard the ship, had Killian sold them? Had he dumped them when she had died? She wished that she knew for sure. But her life was different aboard the ship than it had been in the village with her son.
She had learned to block out painful memories, but the ones she kept had to do with both Rumple and Killian and little Baelfire of course. Still now she had to make a new life since the people she knew had moved on with theirs. Yes she still in some ways had her ex-husband and her son in her life--but she wasn't too sure about Killian since she hadn't seen him yet. There was no telling what would happen as a result. But this town--was growing on her. It wasn't home--not yet anyway. But it was getting there. Because her son was here. And that was all that mattered.
She had been sitting in her room at the bed and breakfast. She had just decided to clean up the place, and to get cleaned up herself for the day. As she didn't really have any real plans for the day, because it wasn't like she had much to keep her that busy. There was always the children. Though that, would remind her of her time in the Underworld. Something she was hoping to avoid after all. But of course, what choice did she have? Children--guarding them was something she had always known since being in the Underworld. All of them were young, unable to defend themselves against Hades if he were to go after them. 'Course that didn't surprise her in the least. Nothing about Hades was good.
She didn't know how much her son had missed her. Only that she knew she had caused him pain that would take years to get over, if it was at all possible. She had so much on her mind ever since returning back to life as it were. Of the pain and the heartaches that she'd caused, all had been coming to light. It was hard to put into words the way she felt about all of this. But she couldn't think--dwell on that for now.
It seemed like it was too quiet. Quiet was something she had to get used to. It wasn't like the sea--where it could lull her into a peaceful sleep. That was something she wished for but it never came. Yes she had slept since she had returned to this life, but it was not near as tranquil as it had been when she had once sailed on the Jolly Roger. But that time was over. And she had to remind herself of that. As much as she wished she didn't have to. She'd had a headache so she had a glass of water by her bed and had gotten some 'medicine' that was more modern than what she had been used to, to cure the bloody thing.
Of course she had no idea that she and her son were living in the same place, otherwise she would have gone to see him after their first encounter but she figured it was also better for him to come to her. Because she knew she couldn't keep pushing for it. If he wanted it, he'd seek her out. If not, well she would have to deal with that loss all over again. She had just laid down on her bed when she heard the door being knocked upon. At least she thought it had only been a few minutes, though by looking on the clock it clearly had been at least an hour since she had first laid down. She slowly rose and got to her feet. The headache had minimized thankfully, to where it was almost unnoticeable. She didn't even peep through the hole to see who it was, instead she just opened the door to see her son standing there. With a box of something. "Hello, Baelfire --Neal." She had a hard time still adjusting to the fact he went by Neal here. "Come on in." She opened the door so that her son could have a chance to pass her to come inside. Because once he had, she would shut the door behind him and lock it. Just something she had done ever since her ex-husband had helped her get this room. Since she truly had no where else to go. And even less of an idea who to trust.
Neal Cassidy